24/11/2011
tired day for me....
last night didnt sleep well due to we are rushing our assignment....
and err guess what~
the thing that matters me and makes me feel very uneasy..
i had finally solve it..
well...after i went out the office..make a called to my mum..
i broke into tears again~=D..wtfish..useless..
But yea...it makes me more secure and not that stress after receiving calls from my mum...
and then we went back to AMOS'd studio...and get our job done together =D...
B y the next morning~we took alot of funny pics...
just to release our stress and sleepiness
OKAY...ENOUGH FOR THE FUNNY ONE lol...
The next thing which make me relief or more stress is...
I accidentally found out that he....my ex..had a new gal....
and urrr....my feelings on that time?
Of course..i feel heart broken for one second.....
I SWEAR....JUST FOR ONE SECOND..
and after i knew..there are still lotta friends out there supporting me...
getting to know that i am actually not alone..
I feel blessed..=)
GOD actually loves me for givng me such a challenging matter....
and yet...he still so kind to gave me so many angels around me to comfort me..
I feel warm....i wont feel alone...at least..i didnt turn emo becoz of that..
Just wish that HE wont appear in my dream coz my dream affect me way too much..
SO........oh woah.....i've been gone through lotta shits...
But...in the future..ME BET.....thats lots more cases or matter which 100 % more harder than this...
TRY to learn from the life....it isnt easy..but we have to fully enjoy it..
DO what i want for now......
I GUESS...I WILL BE FINE..
NO~!!! I SHOULD BE FINE.........
because i already chose to LET IT GO....and......
MOVE ON......with a big big step and a big big smile....
Hi its me again...
Wonder why i updated my blog so fast?
Coz i feel like i cant handle the inner pain of mine anymore...
I feel like it going to burst and goes along with my stupid tears...
I DID IT FOR YOU....yes..its true...
December 3rd...I met a guy from facebook which his name call JS...
He's a korean canadian...and we goes along well..
He urrr......he...is UNEXPLAINABLE.....
of course...he is the most amazing thing that happens to me for year 2010....
And with a blink of an eye....December of 2011 is around the corner...
In between these year...theres tons of matter happens...and it never break our bond...i mean..friendship..
Me and him have a special relationship...More than a friend..but unfortunately Less than a lover..
Thats the only way which can describe us best...</3
Today once again...he made me brokedown....
Not because he hurt me...not because he scold me...
It is just because he actually really understand how do i feel....Thats what i feel so touched...
He told me this :' you've always been there for me... and yet...no matter how bad i treat you....you always there. No matter how many times i ignore you...you are there.... no many how many times i say i hate you.....you are always there..
We both are from the different country...
We both are 6 years different from our age...
We both are different races which he is korean and i am a typical chinese..
We dont have any related or whatsoever...
We knew each other by ourself...
And thats already proved that it is totally a miracle thats happens to me...
I told him before once...My wish for my birthday is to meet him under a christmas tree in a snowy days..
Souds stupid again huh? But you know what..it is what actually motivates me to not leaving him alone no matter what...no matter how he treat me...=')
I am not a smart girl....what i did it just straight from my mind..
Thats why when sometimes i hurt myself....i felt it...but i still do it...hahahahahaha~pathetic...
anyway.....
Minutes turn to hours
Hours turn to days
Knew what I have to do
Couldn’t find the words to say
We had the perfect story
Stories have an end
Had to turn the page
Cause to keep you was a sin,
oh
You know i loved you with
everything that I had
But what you needed, I
couldn’t be, had you bad
I cared enough about you,
to give you the chance
To find someone who
cares
I broke your heart
I did it for you
Tore us apart
I did it for you
Just walked away
I did it for you
Oh, for you
You wanted more than my
everything, I did it for you
Someone you knew I
couldn’t be, I did it for you
Why don’t you ever
understand me
But it’s true, it’s true
I did it for you, for you
I could say I’m sorry, wouldn’t
mean a thing
Tell you what you wanna hear
Baby, what you wanted
wasn’t from me
Held you by a string, had to
cut you loose
Cause forever is something
we can’t be
You know I loved you with
everything that I had
But what you needed, I
couldn’t be, had you bad
I cared enough about you,
to give you the chance
To find someone who
cares
I broke your heart
I did it for you
Tore us apart
I did it for you
Just walked away
I did it for you
Oh, for you
You wanted more than my
everything, I did it for you
Someone you knew I
couldn’t be, I did it for you
Why don’t you ever
understand me
But it’s true, it’s true
I did it for you, for you
They say the ones that you love
http://www.hotnewsonglyrics.com
Are the ones that you hurt the most
For all the pain that
I’ve caused you
Baby, I’m sorry
I did it for you
I did it for you
Tore us apart
I’m so sorry babe
I did it for you
Just walked away
I did it for you
For You
You wanted more than my
everything, everything
I did it for you
Someone you knew I couldn’t
be, I did it for you
Why don’t you ever
understand me
But it’s true, it’s true
I did it for you
Once again.... I almost left my blog until it is almost rotten.... My bad luck in 2011 never end... I remember when i started this blog at last year december...and someone told me that 2011 will be a great year. Yet..the person who told this to me also left me... Hmm...Nt to say left me but ....i just gave up.....
Bad news keep rolling to me and i tried my best to solve it with a broad smile .... I TRIED....I TRIED..AND TRIED... but it will never end... just like today.........
For the past 2 days...i keep dreaming about something bad and kinda memories which i dont even wanna look back.. the dreams were like so real until i woke up with all sweating...... But the most shocking things is that i never knew that the nightmare which i am afraid of will become reality...
Whole day of me never laugh nor smile..... Its like my time is all PAUSED...... I get stucked....What lecturer taught me today i barely listen.... even if he tried to make me smile or laugh...it just didnt works..
I never mean to burden anybody or anyone... I try to settle my own emotion when i am alone....but..
I am afraid to look at myself through the mirror when i cried or crying..... Because i cant help myself..i dont know how to comfort myself...
My emotions burst out everything.....
I knew i shouldnt be so weak infront of you guys....so..sorry....
I felt like...the wonderland which i always dreamt of...is getting more futher now....
Maybe i need sometime to calm myself down....
Please....if dear god cooperate with me...
Please....give me a good and happiness life...
Please...I will work hard to reach my wonderland.....
for now....i need to be strong......no matter in inner or outer part of my body....
